Drunken Four-Year-Old Steals Christmas Presents

Yes, it happened in Tennessee, so it’s not entirely surprising?  But.  But.  The story of Hayden Wright seems more like a backstory for Charlie Day on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia than it does an actual, real life news story.

April Wright is 21 years old and is going through a divorce with her husband who is in jail.  She says she is not sure how her 4-year-old managed to get out of the house, open a beer, and steal the neighbor’s presents from under their tree.  Now she’s just glad he’s okay and says she won’t let it happen again.

The child, Hayden Wright, was found around 1:45 am Tuesday, wandering the streets of his neighborhood.  In a police reports, officers said he was wearing a little girl’s dress and drinking a beer. The police report says the child had to be taken to the hospital to be treated for alcohol consumption.

April Wright said, “Biggest concern was him being out there, getting kidnapped, getting run over, the alcohol, having to have his stomach pumped.”

Yup, because otherwise there’s probably nothing to be concerned about.  Other than, you know, a four-year-old drinking beer, sneaking out of the house and stealing Christmas presents from neighbors.  NO BIGGIE!

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