1. The mystery of when Ferris Bueller’s magical day off occurred has been solved, based upon when that Cubs game took place. I won’t ruin the surprise for you.
2. Raccoons attempt to open a door, adorableness ensues. [via]
3. Zooey Deschanel is going to star in a Fox sitcom pilot that sounds disturbingly bad.
The Meriwether project, originally titled Chicks and Dicks, is described as a young ensemble comedy about the sexual politics of men and women. It centers on Jessica, the role Deschanel is eyeing, an optimistic but unlucky-in-love elementary school teacher who, after her most recent break-up, moves out of her apartment with her ex and moves in with a trio of juvenile guys.
4. “Eminem, Muse and Foo Fighters will be among the headliners for Lollapalooza when it returns Aug. 5-7 to Grant Park.”
5. Yes, Hulu is watched by twice as many people as the other five networks’ online sites combined. But the real story here is the growth of online television viewership. Which is further proof that it’s the future, once it becomes easy for the commonplace person to cut the cable cord.