“I exercise regularly. I eat moderate amounts of healthy food. I make sure to get plenty of rest. I see my doctor once a year and my dentist twice a year. I floss every night. I’ve had chest x-rays, cardio stress tests, EKG’s and colonoscopies. I see a psychologist and have a variety of hobbies to reduce stress. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. I don’t have crazy, reckless sex with strangers. If Charlie Sheen outlives me, I’m gonna be really pissed.” — Chuck Lorre, producer of Two and a Half Men, laying his thoughts out on the title card concluding last night’s episode of the sitcom.

In his defense it’s what everyone is thinking on the inside. [via vulture]

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  • lb3 March 1, 2011, 10:58 am

    As a long time viewer of the show, I also believe the show can go on without its “star”. CBS owes it to the remaining cast members and its loyal viewership to make whatever changes it needs to let the show continue.

    I suggest killing off Sheen’s character (the procession of hooker’s and old girlfriends at the funeral alone would be priceless) to be replaced by his “bastard son” from a high school one nighter. As Charlie Harper’s son and heir, the new character would inherit the beach house in Malibu, leaving Allen and his dim witted spawn to remain there as free-loading relatives.

    The new dynamic will give new energy to the show.


    CBS shouldn’t jetison Sheen entirely. They should cast him in a reality show with his “goddesses”.

    The ‘d suggestthe rest of the cast

  • eddiethomas February 28, 2011, 2:26 pm

    i think cbs did the right thing in firing charle sheen for the simple reason sheen commite the one unforgivable sin in hollywood . he insulted the fans in public. chalie sheen while a great actor and a funny guy is just that a actor and is replaceable off the top of my head i can think of at least 4 actors who witha little retooling on the show could replace sheen//1 kevin sorbow2 david hasslehoff 3timothy dalton 4 kefer sutherland any one of which as i said could replace sheen with a little retooling for example saying in the show chaile haprer had to go on tour over seas and is leting a old freind stay in his house

    • JimBobJones March 2, 2011, 12:16 pm

      i agree. Alan is what makes the shows funny!